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My soft spot for the Gingers…

It’s been a while since I’ve posted something semi-personal so I thought I’d take the opportunity to quickly let you in on a little secret of mine…okay, maybe it isn’t a secret to those who have seen me dampen the front of my trousers whenever I’ve been encountered with a red head. Now, before we go any further…I am not gay and my attraction to red heads purely falls on the opposite sex side of the scale…sorry Horatio, I told you if you carried on stalking me you’d only land up in tears. What? What can I say…that move he makes…(you know which one)…putting his glasses on and taking them off and putting them on and…yah well, that was for me, the hole time…shocking huh?!?

Moving one…I think the psychology behind my mini-obsession for red heads dates back to a prep school teacher I had growing up, but I’m not going to go into those gory details right now, so I’ll just lean towards my other suspicion for my affection towards the fire heads…I’ve never been with one! There, I said it…! I’ve never even kissed a red head and that burning desire to do so has lead me to this point…yes…this dark…lonely…desperate place awaiting A Light Giving Maiden to come and light up my darkness and save me from my wretched lair!

*Ahem* Okay, I’ll shut up now and just get on with it and in now particular order of preference I might add:

1. Isla Fisher.

Australian. Gorgeous. Funny. Talented. Married to Sacha Baron Cohen. Fail. She will be mine…oh yes, she will be mine!

I would be happy to be her man-slave. The end.

2. Julianne Moore.

Beautiful. Alternate. Porcelain skin. And a supposed sex-drive for miles. Come to me my precious!

I have no words...only love for this Ginger.

3. Natalya Rudakova.

Somewhat unknown (Transporter 3’s damsel in distress). Hot as balls. Incredible complexion…yes, freckles and all. Two scoops of that orange flavour please!

Ridiculous I know, right? Woof!

4. Marcia Cross.

Bree and not the cheese. Tall. Toned. Redhead extravaganza…I’d lie in the puddles she’d normally get her feet wet in…

Weak at the f-ing knees I tell you, weak at the knees!

5. Laura Prepon.

Full bodied Redhead. Flawless. Powerful. “That 70’s Show” hottie of note…I’d allow this woman to own my soul.

Just take me away and beat me my mistress!

So now you all know the truth…how does it make you feel that I, as a perfectly functioning human being, would rather make love to one of these Ginger-carrying beauties than burn them at the stake?!

In this I ask…with so much beauty in the world, don’t you think we can cut the Gingers a bit of slack?

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9 comments on “My soft spot for the Gingers…

  1. rj
    August 14, 2013

    Bro, that fairer sex is so limited. Even after growing up from a young manwhore was I lucky enough to finally run head on into the Most Beautiful Celtic Spirited Green Eyed Lass. Even though it lasted less than a year, it resulted in a book of poetry and the hottest/loudest year of my life …
    Don’t give up the dreams.

  2. lexamantis
    January 4, 2011

    Dude – I LOVE me a bit of a Red head. Male, of course… Most of my teenage years I was a strawberry blond, so I guess it resonates with me. So don’t feel alone in your teeny tiny obsession with the gorgeous Gingers out there. It happens to the best of us 🙂

    • Dave
      January 4, 2011

      Haha…loving that Maresa and thank you for the comment!

      Yah, my red head obsession is spawn from The Fifth Element…Milla Jovovich (aka: LeeLoo) just did it for me…can’t explain it, it just did! Amazing!

      “MultiPass…”

  3. Thulane
    October 10, 2010

    You need to tell me the story about your teacher…

    • Dave
      October 11, 2010

      YAY! Attention people…Mr.Hadebe is on the blog…yoh!

      Thanks for coming by Toolz and yes, I will definitely tell you…maybe another Parkhurst/Wine expedition is in order!

  4. Chantel
    August 25, 2010

    YES! I don’t understand why so many people hate gingers 🙂 lol! Red-heads can be really pretty. I LOVE Isla Fisher, she is gorgeous!

    • Dave
      August 25, 2010

      Neither do I Chantel, it’s ridiculous…plus, they’re supposedly a dying ‘breed’…hate to use that word, okay…how about ‘race’? Sounds even worse, oh well…you know what I men…I swear this world will miss them when they’re gone — I know I certainly will

  5. beeep
    August 17, 2010

    haha sexy ladies

    • Dave
      August 17, 2010

      Yes…they…are.

      I smell SPAM.

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This entry was posted on August 6, 2010 by in Blogging, David Alves and tagged , , , , , , .
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